More Than OK
by Sunni
Summary: A Carby post-ep to "Lockdown"


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Title: More Than Ok

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Author: Lanie

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Disclaimer: The characters and the premise don't belong to me. shrug Whatever. 

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Spoilers: "Lockdown"

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Notes: Post-ep resolution fic for the season 8 finale. 'Tis a Carby, but then… What did you expect? **Muchas propidas to my beta** Got feedback? Send it to mksid@shaw.ca 

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"We're gonna be ok…. We're gonna be ok."

***

Abby smiled slightly as Carter leaned in to kiss her a second time. Her grip loosened around his neck, the palm of her hand sliding to rest on his shoulder. She closed her eyes as their lips touched once again. The second kiss was filled with more heat than the first, as the two allowed themselves to give in and fall into each other. Abby could not help but sigh softly as John Carter's hands circled her waist and upwards along her back, and down to her waist again. The ice pack she had been holding slipped out of her right hand and onto the gurney. With both hands free, Abby brought them up to his head and slowly began to comb her fingers through his warm, damp hair. "This feels so right…." She thought to herself.

And then, as quickly as it had begun, the kiss was over. Carter drew his head upwards again and both took a deep breath in an effort to slow down their racing heartbeats. Carter's hands remained resting gently on Abby's hips, and her hands slid back around his neck. She opened her eyes and looked up at him as he looked down at her, a peaceful expression displayed on her face. Carter broke his gaze long enough to look at the ceiling, and he chuckled slightly. 

"Is it just me, or did it just get even hotter in here?" He lowered his head to look at her again and was amused to find Abby fighting back her own laughter. 

"Umm… Yeah." Abby found herself more than a little breathless as she replied. She broke her grasp from around his neck and brought one hand to her forehead as if to wipe away some sweat. "I don't think standing so close is very good."

"Oh but it is," Carter responded. Abby was disappointed when she felt his hands lift off her hips, but her disappointment was relieved when she felt them take her own and bring them down to her sides, his fingers entwining with hers. She looked down at her right hand in his left, then back up at Carter. She noticed the not-so-innocent smile on his face.

"What?"

Carter laughed a little as he shook his head. "It's… this… "

Abby frowned. "This? You and me? That 'this'?"

Carter looked upwards again, shaking his head more vigorously. He looked around the room. "No. Here. This. Stuck in the trauma room of a quarantined ER… 100 degrees, no air conditioning…. Standing here. Together."

It was Abby's turn to laugh. "Hardly seems like the most romantic place…."

"No. No it doesn't…." 

Abby noticed his gaze drift again, this time to the trauma room behind her. His eyes took on a look of seriousness as reality took over more quickly. She heard him sigh a little as he stepped back away from her, reluctantly releasing one of her hands as his did so. Abby looked back at him, concerned. She turned and followed his gaze into the next room. To the little boy lying helplessly on the gurney there. To the grieving, exhausted parents sitting vigil beside their son. Abby looked back at Carter and searched for the words of assurance to comfort him.

"You know, you did a great job in there. He's going to make it because of you." She smiled a little as his eyes met hers once again. 

Carter returned her smile. "Let's hope you're right." He squeezed her hand gently before he released it. He moved to run his fingers through his hair and tug at the collar of his scrub shirt as he looked out into to the ER hallway.

Abby lowered her head towards the floor as she wiped some sweat from the back of her neck. "We should drink something before we pass out."

Carter nodded silently, and Abby went to the sink. Taking a couple Dixie cups and filling them, she looked out the window, towards the admit desk. She could see Susan talking to Torres, while Gallant was escorting a limping riot victim to a nearby gurney. Everyone else seemed to have settled down for the time being. Carter's speech had sedated them somewhat. The television was still on, and some patients had gathered around it, watching whatever unfolding coverage the news stations were able to gather about the lockdown. She wondered what the situation was like outside the ER. God, she'd kill for some fresh air and a cigarette.

Abby returned to Carter – who was pacing slowly in front of the gurney – and handed him a cup. "It's not very cold, but it's better than nothing." 

Carter took the cup and downed the water. He swallowed with satisfaction, and went back to the sink himself for more. Abby drank half her water and sat down on the gurney. Her head was throbbing. She was slightly nauseous. All the symptoms of a good hangover, manifesting themselves in a bout of heat stroke. She cursed the fact that the Tylenol was in the drug lock-up across the hall. Leaning back on the gurney, she grabbed the ice pack she'd absently discarded in the heat of the moment and placed it on top of her forehead, closing her eyes.

Carter turned back from the sink and saw Abby lying on the gurney behind him. He frowned with concern as he approached her. 

"Are you ok?" 

"Mmm-hmm." Abby nodded a little and waved her free hand from side to side as if to brush away the issue. 

"I just need to… Not move for the next five minutes."

"Alright." Carter reluctantly accepted her response, deciding to let her have some time. "I'm going to check in on Adam." 

Abby's eyes fluttered open and she looked up at him. She was silent for a few moments, trying to study his face, his expression. "Ok." She replied quietly, and allowed her eyes to close one more time. 

Carter stared back at Abby for a few more seconds before he shook his head, put on a gown and pushed open the door to the next room. Thinking twice, he doubled back and grabbed a mask. Really, he thought, the damage had already been done. He'd already been exposed. Still, precautions were made for a reason. He slipped the mask over his nose and mouth and made his way into Trauma Two. 

Adam's parents were flanked on either side of the boy's gurney, each holding a small hand. At first glance, they appeared to be asleep. Robin's head was resting near her son's, and Craig was sitting with his chin in his free hand. Carter looked at Adam's chart briefly. He glanced at the monitors for several moments, nodded and made a few notes. Adam's cardiac rhythm and pulse-ox were holding steady. He looked to be stable at the moment, and this filled Carter with slight relief. Placing the chart at the foot of the gurney, he was about to leave the family be when he heard someone stir behind him. 

"How is he, Doctor?" 

Carter turned to face Craig. "He's stable right now." 

"Is he going to be alright?" 

Carter looked from Craig to Adam and then back to Craig. "It's too soon to know for sure. I really can't say. They…. We don't know what it is, yet."

Craig nodded. "Thank you, Dr. Carter." He turned back to watch his son and wife sleep. Carter went again to leave, when Craig's voice pulled him back into the room again. 

"It's my fault." 

Cater swallowed, trying to think of what to say next. "You didn't know." 

"I made them come with me. I took them with me. I should have left them here." 

Carter took a moment to study the scene before him. A family united - yet divided - by illness, death and the unknown. "You should get some rest, now. We'll wake you if his condition changes." 

Craig turned to look at Carter, grateful sadness glistening in his eyes. "Thank you." 

Carter nodded and Craig resumed his vigil. Carter lingered for a few moments, half-expecting him to speak again, but the room quickly stilled. He pushed open the door back to Trauma One and left the three in peace. Yanking off his mask and ripping off the gown, Carter let out a long, exhausted sigh. He tossed the gown aside and rubbed his neck. Now that things had calmed down, it felt cooler in the room. He was thankful for that. He allowed himself a moment to look at Abby, who was still lying back on the gurney. Her eyes were closed, and as Carter observed more closely, he could see that her breathing had slowed. She was asleep. He smiled. Walking over to the to the sink, he ran himself another cup of water and looked out into the ER. Things were considerably calmer now. Many of the disgruntled patients had run out of steam to fight much more. The television was still on, but Carter couldn't make out what was showing. Susan was sitting at the admit desk, looking over a chart with Luka. He could see Torres talking into a phone, nodding. He hoped that was a good sign that things were winding down. 

Carter crushed his cup and threw it into the sink. He looked around the room and shook his head. The ER was going to need a major clean-up after this was all over. His gaze drifted back to Abby. She looked peaceful, and he was a little jealous that she had been able to fall asleep amid all this. As he looked at the empty spot she left at the end of the gurney, he contemplated sitting next to her. However, he didn't want to disturb her just yet, so he opted to sit on the floor, against the wall. It was much cooler near the ground, anyway.

Carter groaned as he slouched down, letting his back slide against the wall. He left his legs stretched out in front of him, deciding that this was the coolest, most comfortable way of sitting on the floor of a hot and sticky trauma room. He leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes. He was like that for only a moment when a voice snapped him out of the beginning of a trance. 

"You know, if you wanted to sit on the gurney, all you had to do was ask. Now I feel bad." 

Carter opened his eyes and looked at Abby. She was still lying with the ice pack on her forehead. "I thought you were sleeping. I didn't want to disturb you."

Abby removed the ice pack from her head and propped herself up with her elbows. "Too late."

Carter gave her a sheepish smile. "Will you make room for me?" 

In response, Abby righted herself by swinging her legs over the edge of the gurney. She patted the spot next to her. "Hop up, old man." 

"Hey…." Carter made to push himself off the floor. He groaned rather loudly as he tried to stand up right, one hand instinctively going to his lower back. 

Noting his position, Abby cocked her head to the side and raised an eyebrow. "Need a little help there, Dr. Carter?"

"Har har." He winced as he straightened himself out and staggered towards the gurney, finally coming to rest next to her. "See, I can do it," he said with trying pride. 

She nodded and smiled meekly. "How are you feeling?"

Carter paused for a moment, thinking. "Cooler," he replied, looking at her. "You?"

Abby yawned and attempted to stretch a little. "Exhausted." She nodded towards Trauma Two. "How is he?"

"Stable."

"That's a relief."

Carter nodded silently and looked at the floor. Abby mimicked his actions, propping her head up in her hands, her elbows resting on her knees. She glanced up at the clock on the wall. One-fifteen A.M. "I was supposed to be off three hours ago. I wonder how long this will go on."

Carter threw himself upright as he laughed bitterly. "If they would just give us the vaccine…"

Abby looked at him sideways. "They will when they know what it is."

"It's smallpox."

She raised her eyebrows. "How do you know?" 

Carter stared at her for several seconds, his face expressionless. Shaking his head, he looked up at the ceiling. "Fifty years… " He looked back at Abby and noticed her expression. "What?"

Abby was silent for a few seconds before she broke her gaze with him. She looked at the floor. "Nothing."

He persisted. "What is it?" 

She laughed lightly and shook her head. "It's nothing…"

"Abby…."

Abby's head snapped towards him. "Why did you kiss me?"

Carter was taken aback by her outburst. "Why? I…." He drifted off, thinking of a proper excuse. He sighed when he couldn't think of one. "It felt like the right thing to do." 

Abby's jaw dropped. "It felt like the right thing to do. Really?"

Carter jumped off the gurney. "Yeah. It probably wasn't the right thing to do, but it felt like it." He turned to face her. "Was it?"

"Was it what?"

He rolled his eyes. "Was it the right thing to do?"

Abby opened her mouth to respond, then shut it. How could she answer that? She saw the way he was looking at her, and her heart nearly broke. How could she give him the answer he deserved, the answer she wanted to give him, without screwing everything up? 

"John…. I- "

Her response was cut off by the sound of the door to Trauma Two swinging open. 

"Dr. Carter! He's waking up!"

Carter spun around and saw Craig holding the door to Adam's room open. He could see Robin in the background, leaning over and whispering encouraging words to her son. He made his way towards the room, not hearing Abby shout out his name in protest.

Abby watched Carter rush into the next room unprotected. She grabbed two masks and followed him. 

Sure enough, Adam had regained consciousness. His eyes were wide open by the time Carter and Abby had made it to his bedside. Robin was holding his hand tightly, tears streaming down her face. Adam looked from his mother to Dr. Carter, to his father and then to his mother again. He opened his mouth to speak, but he quickly realized that the effort was futile. Instead, he started to lift his free hand to his neck, where the trach-tube was. Abby quickly caught the boy's hand and brought it back down to his side.

"Shh… It's alright, Adam. That tube is helping you breathe." Abby could see the fear in his eyes at the discovery of the tube, and she squeezed his hand in an effort to reassure him. She looked up at Carter, whose eyes were dancing from the monitors to the boy and back to the monitors. She stepped aside so he could check Adam's pulse. "What is it?"

Carter looked at his watch and shook his head. "His pulse is up, but it's steady. 

Abby looked at one of the monitors. "Pulse-ox is 88."

Carter nodded. "We should keep the tube in. To be safe." He turned to face Robin and Craig, who were hovering nervously over their son. "He seems to be improving. We're going to keep the tube in his throat for a little longer, until we know he's in the clear. We can give him something more to sedate –"

"No!" Robin's frantic, yet determined voice cut him short. "No more." Behind her, Craig gave Carter a pleading look.

Carter looked at Adam, who was staring up at the four standing around him. "Ok. We won't give him anything, for now. He'll probably fall asleep again, though."

"When are we going to know something?" Craig asked. 

Before Carter could answer, there was a sharp knock on the door to the ER hallway. All four looked towards the noise and saw Torres standing there. He gestured towards the next room. Carter nodded and turned back to Robin and Craig.

"This might be what we've been waiting for. Will you excuse us for a moment?" 

Craig and Robin nodded in unison and turned their attention back to Adam. Carter looked at Abby. They exchanged hopeful expressions and headed back into Trauma One. Torres was waiting for them. 

"We've isolated and identified the disease."

Abby looked from Torres to Carter and back to Torres. "It's smallpox?" 

Torres shook his head. "Not quite. It's monkey pox."

Her eyes grew wide. "Monkey pox?"

Torres continued. "A severe strain. The symptoms mimic smallpox, but it's not as contagious… Nor is it as deadly."

"But…"

"The younger the victims are, the weaker their defenses to the disease are. The majority of the casualties are under the age of twelve years." Torres stated in an obvious tone, explaining why the little girl had died. 

Abby looked at Carter, who had been silent. He returned her glance, and swallowed slowly. "Is there a vaccine?"

"There is, and it's on its way. We'll give it out, just as a precaution." He paused and allowed his point to settle. "The department realizes that we've been taking drastic measures throughout this entire situation, but you have to know that it was for the safety of everyone that we did so. If this had in fact been smallpox, the outcome may have been disastrous.

"Again, we'd like to thank you for your help in treating this situation the best way that you've been able. This was a rare and unexpected event, but your professionalism has been outstanding. This could have been a lot worse."

"But it wasn't." Carter's voice was harsh, almost bitter.

"No, it wasn't. And you two deserve much credit for that."

Carter shrugged and looked towards Trauma Two. 

Abby spoke up. "How much longer are we going to have to wait like this?"

"Not much longer. We're setting up a vaccination station right now, and we'd appreciate it if you would help us deliver them." Torres looked at Carter. "How's the boy?"

Carter glared at Torres for a few seconds before responding. "Stable. He's going to pull through."

Torres nodded. "Good." He looked at Abby. "We'll let you know when the vaccine has arrived." 

With the final word, Torres exited Trauma One, leaving Abby and Carter alone. They stood there in silence for a few moments, each one trying to let the information settle in their minds. Carter walked over to the window and stared out into the ER. Abby watched his back as he stood there, and was about to open her mouth to speak when she saw his shoulders shake and heard the laughter. 

"What?" 

Carter turned to face her, his chuckles subsiding. He shook his head. "Monkey Pox? Doesn't that just make this whole thing seem a little trivial?"

She folded her arms across his chest and gave him a puzzled look. "No. You just think so because you were wrong."

"I'm not mad that I was wrong."

"You're not?"

"No. I'm just…." He drifted off and shrugged the subject aside. They stood there looking at each other. Their game of silence was interrupted when Susan came and knocked on the door. She poked her head inside. 

"Hey, guys. Abby… Vaccine is here. Can you give me a hand?"

"Yeah," she replied, her eyes never leaving Carter. She raised her eyebrows at him. "You gonna be ok?"

He laughed a little and nodded. "Yeah." He nodded towards Adam's room. "I should go and tell them."

"Ok."

They passed each other as they headed for opposite exits. Abby pushed open her door and paused, turning to say something to Carter, who was already disappearing into Trauma Two. She sighed, disappointed, and followed Susan out into the ER. 

****

A while later, Abby found herself nearing the end of the line of those waiting for vaccines. Malik was helping her out, while Susan, Luka and Carter tended to the neglected patients. Everyone had consented to the vaccine, more out of exhaustion than fear now. They wanted to leave, but Torres said that they wanted all the vaccinations to be given out before he let anyone go. So Abby plugged along, vaccinating patient after patient.

"My dear, you look so tired." One of the senior citizens commented as Abby swabbed her upper arm. 

Abby picked up the syringe and smiled weakly at the woman. "I am. It's been a long day."

"Well, it's almost over now." 

Abby looked at Malik, who was trying his best not to laugh. "Let's hope so." She finished up and placed a band-aide over the spot she'd vaccinated. "All done." 

"Thank you, and be sure to get some sleep soon, my dear." 

"I will."

Abby tended to the last few people in line. When she was done, she sighed heavily and snapped her gloves off. "Finished."

"Thank you God." Malik chimed in. 

She smiled at him. "Thanks for all your help."

Malik picked up his supplies. "Anytime." He turned back towards Abby before leaving the exam room. "And do get some sleep. You look like crap."

"Ha ha. Thanks a lot!" She shouted to his retreating form. She shook her head and began to pack up her supplies. She was so engrossed in her task that she was startled by a knock on the doorframe. 

"Got time for one more patient?" 

Abby looked up and saw Carter standing in the doorway. She smiled at him and tilted her head. "I was wondering what happened to you. I thought maybe you'd snuck out or something." 

Carter approached her and sat down on the bed. He pushed up his sleeve so she could swab it. "Believe me, the idea did cross my mind."

She laughed lightly and prepared the syringe with his vaccination. "Some night, huh?" 

"Yeah. Hard to believe it's nearly over."

"How's Adam?" 

"He's, uh…" Carter was distracted for a moment as Abby stuck him with the syringe. "… Good. He's off the respirator. They admitted him into an isolation room up on Peds."

Abby looked at Carter and smiled. "That's great news." She placed a band-aide over his vaccination spot and rolled down his sleeve. "There you go, Dr Carter. You're free to go."

He smiled. "Thank you, Nurse Lockhart. Need any help packing up?"

She placed the last of her supplies in the box. "Actually, I think I've got everything, thank you." She picked up the box and started to make her way towards the door. 

Carter followed Abby out and into the admit area. He noticed Susan standing there, waiting for them. "Hey, you should go home," he said to her.

Susan rolled her eyes. "No kidding. I'm waiting for Weaver to show up." She perked up when she saw Abby. "Hey, thanks for doing those vaccinations." She paused and cocked her head to the side, thoughfully. "Boy, you two certainly had an exciting night, huh?" 

Abby exchanged a glance with Carter. She looked at Susan quizzically. "What do you mean?"

Susan shook her head in astonishment. "I heard how you saved that boy's life. Nice work."

"Oh, that was all Carter," Abby purred as she gave him a look of mock admiration. Susan laughed.

Carter shook his head at the two women and shrugged. "It was nothing anyone else would have done differently." 

Susan was impressed. "Good answer, Dr. Carter. Save it for the reporters."

"Reporters?"

She nodded towards the ambulance bay. "Out there. They're just itching for a first-hand medical account."

Abby groaned and buried her head in her hands. "Will it end…"

Carter looked around the ER for another way out. "Maybe we can make a quick exit out the back."

"Yeah, well, good luck with that." Susan spotted Dr. Weaver coming out of the lounge. "Here comes my escape." She looked at her watch. "Argh. I'm supposed to be on again in six hours."

Carter pushed himself away from the admit desk and allowed Susan to pass by him. "Lucky you."

"Yeah, right. Goodnight, guys." Susan gave a small wave behind her as she headed off into the ambulance bay to fend off the reporters. 

Carter and Abby watched as their friend disappeared from their sight and turned back to each other. Abby tilted her head to the side and looked at Carter. "Well, what do you say? Wanna make a run for it?" 

Carter laughed and shrugged. "Might as well try."

They were making their way to the lounge just as Dr. Weaver spotted them trying to leave. 

"Carter! Abby! Where do you two think you're going?"

Carter exchanged a look with Abby. "Umm… Home."

Kerry frowned. "Oh? Well... Ok. I wanted to talk to you about what happened in there tonight. I guess it can wait. From what I hear, though, you two did an excellent job."

"Yeah, well… We make a good team." Carter looked down at Abby, who was trying her best to suppress a smile. 

Kerry nodded and started to head in the other direction, turning back momentarily to shout one last order. 

"Go get some rest!"

Abby and Carter gathered their things from the lounge and headed towards the bay doors. Though she was eager to get out into fresh air, she immediately noticed when Carter stopped just a few feet from the door. She spun around on her heel and glared at him. "What is it?"

Carter smiled devilishly and caught up to her side, swinging his arm towards the door. "After you." 

Abby quickly caught on to what he was trying to do and shook her head, laughing. "Oh no. No you don't. You first."

"But I insist. Ladies first."

"Cut the chivalry," she snapped playfully, shoving him towards the automatic doors. 

He was fast, catching her hand as she tried to get away and pulling her outside with him. They tumbled through the doors, dissolving in a fit of laughter as the night air hit them. They were pulled back to reality at the instant several sharp flashes interrupted their reverie. Turning slowly, they were greeted by a dozen quote-hungry reporters stationed behind the guarded police barriers several feet away, watching them.

Abby looked sheepishly at the gathered group. "Uh oh." 

Carter was less embarrassed. Looking down at Abby, he leaned in to whisper, "Follow my lead," before he pulled her towards the crowd. He didn't notice the unsure look she gave him as they approached the reporters. 

Suddenly the air around them erupted with questions.

"Arianna Black, channel six. Are you Dr. Carter?"

"Sun Times. Can you tell us what it was like in quarantine?"

"Are you the two that treated the children?"

"Scott Everet, Fox News. Is the boy going to live?"

"Any news on where this disease came from?"

Carter swayed back and forth on his heels a few times and cleared his throat as an indication that he wanted to speak. Abby looked up at him curiously, as did the reporters with much more expectancy. 

"My name is Dr. John Carter, and I am Chief Resident here at County. This is Nurse Abigail Lockhart." Carter looked down at Abby as he said her name, and was mildly amused by the look of panicked protest she gave him. He squeezed her hand and continued. "We were the two that treated both children when they were admitted into the ER this afternoon. They were quickly isolated from the rest of the hospital to avoid further spread of the disease. The entire ER staff worked very hard to keep the situation under control, and they should be commended for their efforts.

"Everything has calmed down now. As you probably already know, the disease has been identified as monkey pox. It's not very contagious, but vaccinations were given as a precautionary measure. 

We have no idea where this strain came from or how far it has spread. As you can probably gather, it's been quite the night for all of us here at County. We thank you for your continued interest and support, but now things have calmed down, and we'd like it if you just let us continue to do our jobs. Any further questions can be directed to the Center for Disease Control. Thank you, and goodnight… Or rather… Good morning everyone." 

Carter smiled and nodded at the reporters before moving aside and continuing out of the ambulance bay, tugging an open-mouthed Abby alongside him.

"Wow… " Abby was speechless as Carter dragged her quickly down the street away from the hospital. 

"Were you… Were you even supposed to say half the stuff you just said?"

Carter shrugged, a self-satisfied expression on his face. "Probably not." 

Abby shook her head as she tried to keep up with Carter's long strides. It wasn't hard to do as he was still holding her hand. They walked in silence for a few moments as they unconsciously headed to a familiar location. Rounding a corner, they slowed their paces as they approached the river walkway. The night was growing into dawn, and as exhausted as they may have been, both felt an incredible energy rush as they enjoyed the fresh breeze coming off the water. Carter reluctantly dropped Abby's hand as they reached the railing. She leaned forward against it, sticking her neck out, and breathed a heavy, contented sigh as she looked out into the beyond. Carter turned his back to the water, preferring to look at the woman standing next to him. 

She caught his gaze and smiled. "You were great back there." 

He returned her smile. "Thanks. You were pretty good, too."

She raised her eyebrows. "Me? What, you mean the way I just stood there?"

He shook his head and looked away. "No. I mean, today."

Abby's expression softened. "Oh." She looked out over the water. "Thanks."

Carter nodded. "You were… You are, amazing. Do you know that?" 

Abby turned her head at his question. When she saw how he was looking at her, her cheeks grew hot. "Not really. But thank you." 

She smiled, closing her eyes, and leaned into his hand as he reached over to brush a stray lock of hair away from her cheek.

"Should I walk you home?"

Abby shook her head, eyes still closed. "I'm not tired."

He smiled at her. "Liar." 

She opened her eyes at his accusation and smirked. He chuckled at her expression. 

"What time are you on tonight?"

Abby looked out over the water and sighed again. "Mmm…. I'm not." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. "You?"

"Graveyard shift."

"Ahhh…. Sorry." She gave him a look of sympathy. "Do you want to go home?"

Carter shook his head. "I'm not tired."

She smiled coyly. "Liar."

He returned her smile. "I guess I deserved that." Their eyes remained locked on each other for a few brief moments, before Abby dared to break the trance, looking back out over the river. Carter's eyes shifted downwards at the ground, disappointed. Abby heard him inhale deeply.

"Abby…." He let her name fade as he exhaled. 

Abby hung her head. "John, don't…"

"Don't what?" He shot back, defensively.

Abby sighed and brought her head up to face Carter. "Don't do this... I can't do this."

Carter raised his eyebrows. "This?" He waved his hand back and forth between them to indicate his point. "You can't do us?"

When she looked away and didn't respond, Carter shook his head and pushed himself away from the railing, leaving her side. Abby turned around to follow him and found him a few feet away, his back facing her. 

"What do I need to do…" His voice was low, almost mute.

"Nothing." She spoke softly, as if sudden noise would irritate him. 

He spun around to face her. "Nothing? Come on, Abby! There has to be something that I haven't done to make you realize…." He paused and stepped forward. "… To make you realize how much I want to be with you. Tell me, Abby. Tell me what you need." 

Abby cast her eyes downwards as she summoned the courage to say what her heart was screaming. Tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, she took a deep breath and looked back up at Carter. His face was a mix of question and longing. 

"We can't continue like this, John. I can't stand to be with you and not _be_ with you. We've done this… dance… for two years. We're nervous. We're scared. To be together. To be apart…."

Abby closed the distance between herself and Carter and took his hands in hers, much the same way Carter had done earlier. Standing in this position, Abby found the remaining strength she needed to continue.

"You asked me if that kiss was the right thing to do. I don't know. I don't care. It _felt_ right, John." She paused. "I haven't been fair to you in the past. I made mistakes. I pushed you away. Believe me…. No one regrets the things I've done more than me. I want to make it right. I want us to be the right thing to do. I want to be with you."

When she finished, Abby smiled out of relief. Relief that she'd finally let her heart do the talking. She took a few moments to look at Carter silently, trying to read his expression. She didn't have to wait long for his reaction, as she felt him bring her hands up to his face. He kissed each one gently and tightened his grip on them. She heard him sigh softly as he did so, his breath warm against her skin. He looked back at her with a look she knew he'd reserved for this very moment.

"I don't think I could have said it better myself."

She blushed. "I bet you could if you tried." 

Carter raised his eyebrows, his smile growing. "Do you want me to?"

Abby shook her head. "I think your face says it all."

"Does it?"

She nodded silently.

"Well, I'm surprised..." Carter leaned in closer, his voice barely a whisper. Abby felt a chill in anticipation of what was to come next. 

"Tell me... Does it say this?" He closed the distance between their faces, his lips coming down over hers in a gentle kiss. 

"Or this?" He kissed her again.

"How about this?" Carter kissed her once more, softly, before pulling back a little, his face inches away from hers, studying her face. Her eyes were closed, a peaceful, content look on her face, her lips puckered slightly, waiting for the next kiss. 

"Abby…."

"Mmm?" Abby reluctantly opened her eyes to look up at him. When she saw the way he was staring at her, she frowned. "What?"

"You're amazing."

She smiled. "You're pretty wonderful yourself. Do you know that?"

"As a matter of fact…" Carter dropped Abby's hands to her sides, bringing his own arms around her waist, drawing her body to his. "… I do."

Abby cocked her head to the side. "We do make a great team, don't we?"

Carter nodded. "Oh yeah." He planted a small kiss on her forehead.

Abby sighed at the feel of his lips on her skin and waited for Carter to pull his head back, his eyes locking with hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Do you think we'll make a great couple?"

Carter was silent, watching her.

Abby reached up on her tiptoes and grazed her lips against his. She pulled his head forward and whispered into his ear. "Tell me we're going to be ok." 

Carter lifted his head back up and looked at her for a moment or two before answering. Leaning down to kiss her once more, Carter could feel her grip tighten around his neck as the kiss grew more intensely passionate. She melted into him, and he draw his arms around her, doing away with whatever minute space remained between their bodies. Lost in their own senses and emotions, they broke several moments later, breathless and panting for air. Carter looked down at the woman he was finally with and said the one thing he could think of that he knew she wanted to hear. 

"We're gonna be great."

*** 

The End. 

  



End file.
